You’re not for everyone.

Mar 2, 2022

I’m trying to write more frequently as promised, more on a whim… less focused on length or being “topic” friendly. I want it to be whatever I feel in the moment, kind of like my Instagram stories. Maybe you’ll relate, maybe you won’t. Which is okay. Also, no… I still haven’t finished my Kitchen Reno blog post. It’s coming. I promise.

How does one grow the confidence to share their life with the world without fear of internet trolls? The truth is, you’ll probably always feel it to some capacity because you’re human… but you have to realize first and foremost that their comments aren’t about you. Another sad truth is…the bigger you get on social media, the more frequent you’ll see it, you’ll grow thicker skin, and become more susceptible to comments. You have to stand strong in your views, what you share, and are authentically you. That’s all you can do. You aren’t for everyone and that’s OK. You may want to write that on a post-it and stick it where you can see it. 

I was back and forth about posting last Friday’s video to the feed in fear of backlash and truthfully, just not wanting to deal with any negative energy. I knew I’d get a lot of love as so many followers are in my corner and trust my process, but also that I’d get a few that are still mentally stuck in my old relationship. Which, I understand. Let me start by saying I got maybe 10 negative comments out of almost 800 (isn’t it interesting how we can SEE the negative amongst all that good?)- It’s sad really, which is why I made a point to let the people posting positive comments know that they were SEEN. A way for me to also mentally cancel out the bad and focus on the good. Something I’m consciously doing. Now, my insecurity to post didn’t last long, but wanted to express that it does happen. I’ve put creativity above anything else these days and I was proud of the video. I feel something, create, edit and post. It’s the only way I can feel confident in showcasing who I am in the most authentic way. 

I guess what I am trying to say is, we all have these moments. The moments will come and go but if we tune in to our most authentic self and just be who we are meant to be… you’ll have nothing to be sorry about. Also remember, you aren’t for everyone and that’s okay.

To the trolls of the world: ask yourself why before pressing send. Get therapy/read a self love/improvement book. Press unfollow on any accounts that make you question your kindness. Put the energy you do trolling into something positive for yourself or someone else. I’m sorry you’re hurting.

xo, Lola