Being almost 2 weeks out until our official due date, I can’t help but think about the fear I once had about delivery. I always knew I wanted children, and to experience pregnancy; but I never wanted to talk about the fact that one day I would have to deliver a baby. Perhaps it was the screaming women in the movies, the inevitable pain we all know women go through just to get their little miracles of life. It was a haunting topic for me and I didn’t want to think or talk about it.
When I first found out that we were pregnant, I was more than excited. For years, we pushed back starting a family; to continue to enjoy just being a married couple. We decided by our 30th birthdays that we would never feel 100% ready, but inevitably we wanted a baby. So the time was now. When the test read PREGNANT, I couldn’t help but have a moment when I thought about the end result. Delivery. I shook it off and decided to ignore the fact that one day (at hopefully 40 weeks) she/he would have to come out.
Then my body started to change. My boobs were sore, muscles were stretching, belly started popping, and now… I am constantly feeling her move around and kick inside me. That in itself has made me realize how amazing the woman’s body is. That I was meant to do this and by experiencing pregnancy myself, I’ve grown a sense of calm and confidence about the whole thing.
JJ and I attended 9 hours of “Preparing for Childbirth” classes. 9 hours he probably wishes he could have back, but truthfully… it was very educational and I recommend everyone take these classes. It gave me all sorts of emotions. Nervous, confident, excited. It’s the real talk and the stuff people don’t tell you about. For those of you who are curious what our birth plan is: it’s to not have a plan. I find too many women have a specific plan when they go in and become disappointed if it doesn’t go exactly how they imagined. My goal is to have a healthy baby, however it needs to be done. Yes, I plan to have an epidural. If you think I was nervous talking about just the fact that I’ll have to deliver, do you think I want to entertain the idea of a natural birth? No. Epidural, please.
This weekend, I am picking up some last minute items and packing a bag for the hospital. I’ll be sharing what I plan to bring for baby and I on the blog this week. As far as the nursery… I am hoping to get a reveal up on the blog before she is born, but I am still waiting on a few pieces to come in. Stay tuned!
Wearing Storq Tank Dress, Keds shoes, Joes Jeans jacket (old)
Photos by aMaes Photography (@aMaes_photography)