“Why is it taking so long for her to walk?”

Before I discuss the question above, I want to mention how truly grateful I am for the positive community I have on social media. Of course, there are some bad eggs that come through here and there, but the majority of the time I have the most uplifting, encouraging, and inspiring followers. So, thank you!

I put this DM on Instagram Story to continue to be honest and share everything with you. This isn’t a reel of happiness every single day and I wanted to show you how I handle these questions. Sure, I am choosing to be in the spot light as an influencer, but I am positive all of you have dealt with mom shame at some point in your life too. Perhaps sharing this may help you prepare on how to answer.

The bottom line: Keep it simple, classy, and straight to the point. The answer is what it is and don’t ever feel like you should over explain why and how you raise your children. NO ONE is doing it the right way. There is no right way and every single child is different. The end.

So, how do I deal with negativity on the internet?

• I’ve been putting myself out there for over 7 years now… therefore, I understand that negativity can come with it. There is a saying, “if you’re getting haters, that means you’re doing something right.” Sad, isn’t it? As a rule of thumb for anyone interested in starting a career in social media, expect negative comments. Unfortunately, it may not always start with strangers either.
• I don’t care what people say/think. I’m not just saying this… it really no longer bothers me. Don’t get me wrong, it didn’t happen overnight. I used to care SO much about what people thought. I dwelled on not getting support from some of my closest friends and even considered changing ways to better my looks. I am so happy I didn’t try to “fix” myself. I’ve grown over the years and have truly learned to love myself. Having the right circle and support system is everything in conquering this.
• Call them out. OK, you don’t have to do this for every comment and question that you get… but when something is really important to address, address it and let it be. There have only been a few things pertaining to Vivienne that I feel the need to set someone straight with. So, I do. You’ll also learn that your followers/friends will start to stand up for you on your behalf.
• Keep it real. When you are only being yourself and people don’t like you, they can only do one thing… unfollow.

I hope this was helpful to anyone dealing with the same struggles. It’s hard enough being a first time mom… be confident in your decisions and don’t let anyone make you feel like you could be doing better/different. You got this!

Photo by @aMaes_photography
Dress by For Love and Lemons

xoxo,
Lola